Why You Feel Stuck
Feeling stuck in life is one of the most common existential struggles people face. Jordan Peterson often describes this as being caught in chaos—the abyss where meaning is absent, and progress feels impossible. In 12 Rules for Life, he emphasizes that when we lack direction, we default to nihilism, resentment, and inaction. If you feel paralyzed by your circumstances, it’s because your mind and environment are not structured to move forward.
Step 1: Clean Your Room – Start With Small, Tangible Actions
One of Peterson’s most famous rules is “Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.” This means that before you take on massive life changes, you must first organize the small, controllable aspects of your life. If your personal space is chaotic, your mind likely reflects the same disorder.
Actionable Step: Clean your room. Literally. It’s not just about tidying up; it’s about demonstrating to yourself that you can impose order on at least one aspect of your existence. This creates momentum.
Step 2: Define Your Aim – Create a Compelling Future
In Beyond Order, Peterson stresses that if you don’t have a meaningful aim, your life will feel directionless. One reason people feel stuck is that they haven’t articulated a goal that is worth pursuing. Without a vision, life turns into a stagnant routine of distractions and passive suffering.
Actionable Step: Ask yourself, What is one thing I could aim at that would make my life better? Write it down. Then break it into small, actionable steps you can take daily.
Step 3: Face the Dragon – Confront Your Fears
Peterson often refers to the mythological motif of the hero confronting the dragon to obtain the gold. In real life, the dragon represents the fears and challenges we avoid. The reason you’re stuck may be because you refuse to face the uncomfortable truths about your life—whether it’s a job you hate, a relationship that’s failing, or an internal struggle with self-doubt.
Actionable Step: Identify one major fear that’s holding you back. Then take a single step toward facing it. If you fear social rejection, initiate a conversation. If you fear failure, start a small project where failure has low stakes.
Step 4: Tell the Truth – Stop Lying to Yourself
In 12 Rules for Life, Peterson argues that lying—especially to yourself—erodes your soul. Many people stay stuck because they construct false narratives about their situation: “It’s not that bad,” “I have time,” “I’ll start tomorrow.” These lies keep you in the same place.
Actionable Step: Be brutally honest with yourself. What is the real reason you feel stuck? Write it down, without self-deception, and take responsibility for changing it.
Step 5: Take Responsibility – No One Else Will Save You
Peterson frequently emphasizes the importance of personal responsibility. It’s easy to blame external forces—society, family, luck—but that mindset leaves you powerless. The moment you decide that you are responsible for your situation is the moment you regain control.
Actionable Step: Write down three things in your life you are unhappy with. Next to each, write what you can do to improve them. Start with the smallest, easiest action.
Step 6: Find Meaning, Not Happiness
Happiness is fleeting; meaning is what sustains us. Peterson warns that a life built on chasing happiness is fragile. Instead, he encourages people to build their lives around deep, meaningful responsibilities—career, family, personal growth.
Actionable Step: Shift your focus from pleasure to purpose. Ask yourself, What responsibility can I take on that would improve my life and the lives of others? Commit to it.
Final Thoughts
Feeling stuck is not a life sentence. It is a signal that something must change. As Peterson teaches, the antidote to chaos is order, meaning, and responsibility. The way out is through structured, meaningful action. Take the first step today, and watch how the path begins to reveal itself. Feeling stuck in life isn’t a permanent state; it’s a call to action.
“You’re not everything you could be, and you know it.” – Jordan Peterson
“You should be afraid of taking risks and pursuing something meaningful, but you should be more afraid of staying where you are if it’s making you miserable.” – Jordan Peterson
Start the journey. Take responsibility. And move forward.
